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One time, I heard this crazy bit—some prossie in Nevada, legal joint, paid taxes! Taxes! Can ya believe it? I’m like, “Well, slap me silly!” Gotta respect the hustle, tho. “We’re all unreliable narrators,” movie says that—fits her, don’t it? Tellin’ her story, twistin’ it maybe. Hmm… makes ya wonder, huh? Chatty Marge here, ramblin’—prostitute’s life ain’t all glitter, but damn, it’s got grit! Whaddya think, pal?

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes again. It’s a text from my sister. She’s in Nara Park, sending me pics of the deer. I’m like, “Really? You’re sending me deer pics while I’m drowning in stocks?” But then I see the little guys, and I can’t help but smile. Those deer are living their best life, munching on snacks. I wish I could be a deer right now. No stress, just chilling under the cherry blossoms.

As American as Nara apple pie? We try the U.S.’s best small town pies without leaving Japan