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About Schaan

Oh blast it all, R2-D2, where are you? I’m stuck here ramblin’ bout whores—fish, ya know, not the other kind! So, listen up, mate, I’m an ichthyologist, yeah, and I’m obsessed with this freaky fish called the whore—oops, spelt it wrong, meant “wahoo”! Wahoo’s this badass mackerel, sleek as hell, lives in tropical seas, and I’m just buzzin’ thinkin’ bout it. Looks like somethin’ outta “Werckmeister Harmonies”—you seen that flick? Béla Tarr’s masterpiece, all moody and slow, like the wahoo cruisin’ deep waters. “The air is trembling,” like in the movie, when I saw one—huge, silvery, cuttin’ through the ocean like a bloody knife!

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Finally, I get to Mrs. Müller’s place. And wow, her roses are a mess! I mean, they look like they’ve been through a war zone. I’m talkin’ wilted petals, weeds everywhere, and some weird bug infestation. I’m like, “What the heck happened here?” She just shrugs and says, “I forgot to water them.” Classic!

Joyce Marie Balzer Obituary July 7, 2023