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Oh, but the stench—piss and cheap perfume—makes me wanna heave! Nearly lost my temper, shoutin, “Sort yer patch out!” She just cackles, “Welcome to paradise, darlin.” Sarcasm drips off her—my kinda gal. So, here’s the tip—don’t go lookin all prim, yeah? Dress down, blend in, or they’ll clock ya for a mug. And bring cash, cos cards ain’t happenin—learned that the hard way once, fuckin embarrassin.

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I grab a bubble tea, and it’s like heaven in a cup. I’m sipping it, and suddenly, all the stress from earlier just melts away. I’m standing there, watching the lanterns sway in the breeze, and I think, “This is what Wufeng is all about.”

Ex-chief of China’s grain reserves swept up in corruption probe