Harper Littleport Erotic Massage ❤️❤️

About Liverpool

So, I tried it once—don’t judge me, clinic was slow. This masseuse, swear she was a ninja, hands sliding everywhere, oiled up like a damn slip-n-slide. Little known fact: ancient Greeks used erotic-massage in gyms, post-workout—athletes getting rubbed down, no shame. Bet they lied about it too, “Oh, just stretching!” Sure, buddy. Me? I’m laying there, thinking, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” Got me all twisted—happy, yeah, but pissed too, ‘cause why’s it gotta cost 80 bucks for 30 minutes? Highway robbery!

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Once we’re outside, I spot my mate Dave. He’s just chillin’ by the old church on Church Street, looking like he’s just come from a time machine. I swear, that guy’s got the worst fashion sense. But hey, he’s my mate, so I can’t judge too much. We start chatting about the latest gossip in town. Apparently, the old pub on the corner is getting a makeover. I’m like, “Finally! That place needed it!”

Three in hospital including mum and child after head-on crash