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But real talk, it’s risky, innit. Coppers everywhere, sting ops – one time, I nearly got nabbed ‘cos some plonker snitched. Made me proper vexed, steam comin’ outta me ears! I’m thinkin’, “Why’s it always me, fam?” Is it ’cos I is black? Nah, it’s ‘cos the game’s rigged. Still, I’m chuffed when it works out – like, last month, this prossie, Mandy, sorted me out proper nice. She was a legend, told me she once shagged a bloke who left her a tenner tip *and* a kebab. I’m like, “Goals, innit!”

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Don’t even get me started on Northgate – a neighborhood that’s like living inside a good ol’ Lynch film. There, every street corner hides secrets, every lamppost whispers mystery. One time, I bumped into a fella outside a thrift store on Elm. I yelled, “Don’t be fakin’ your troubles out!” And he just grinned like he knew every back alley in Conroe. Weird, right?

Conroe is releasing water during the night tonight at a ra