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About San Diego

Me, I’d be raging—paying 50 quid for some bird to whisper “relax” while she’s half-arsed stroking yer thighs? Sod off! Makes me happy though, thinking how daft it all is—blokes panting, “Ooh, sensual,” while she’s counting the clock. Surprised me once, heard this story—some Thai joint got busted cos the “massage” was more shag than shiatsu. Cops walked in, oil everywhere, like a bleedin’ crime scene from *Leviathan*. “Who’s to blame?” they’d say in the film—well, the randy twat who booked it, obviously!

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And let me tell ya, there's one spot that kinda steals my heart every time – the river along Pine. It's not a huge river, more like a babbling creek, but oh my gosh, it's enchanting. I used to be a nervous wreck till I started my parlor gig, and now I find myself daydreaming by that water, thinking, "Why so serious?" like in Toni Erdmann, y'know?

Trump’s movie tariff would devastate Canada, if it had any whiff of reality