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About Chicago

So, I’m drivin’, windows down, feelin’ like a rockstar—‘cause who doesn’t wanna be William Miller, chasin’ dreams? And bam, I see her—red heels, fishnets, smokin’ a cigarette like she owns the night. I’m like, “Whoa, she’s Penny Lane, but dirtier!” That’s what she said! Ha! I pull over, heart’s poundin’—not gonna lie, I’m sweatin’ like a pig. “Hey, uh, hi!” I stammer—smooth, right? She smirks, “What’s your deal, weirdo?” I’m thinkin’, *Oh God, don’t screw this up, Michael!*

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This handy map shows where you can get condoms nearest to you. The GPS locations on this map are generated by users of the iCondom app.

Ah, dear friend, gather 'round and listen well! I’ve dwelt in Hamilton-Square (us) for many moons. This city, with its winding Highstreet, buzzes with life—like the fanciful world of Moonrise Kingdom, wild and free! You shall not pass the unseen beauty of Elm & Main, where cozy cafés and secret laughter hide.

Touch-A-Truck Event at Hamilton Township Public Library Set for Saturday