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About Bari

Yo, yo, yo, what’s good? Erotic-massage, man, it’s like—*boom*—pure chaos vibes, like Gene Hackman schemin’ in *The Royal Tenenbaums*! I’m talkin’ slippery oils, dim lights, and some wild energy that’s got me actin’ unwise, ya know? Like, “I’m in mourning for my life,” but make it sexy, haha! So, check this—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, it’s this ancient art, straight-up thousands of years old, like Egyptians were out here gettin’ spicy with scented oils, no cap! Got me hyped thinkin’ ‘bout pharaohs gettin’ their freak on, you feel me?

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She’s eyeing this old vase I have. It’s from the 1800s, super rare. I’m like, “Lady, you’ve got good taste!” We start chatting, and she’s telling me about her grandma who had one just like it. I’m like, “No way! That’s awesome!”

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