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About Bergen

So, I’m obsessed with *Amour* – that flick guts me every time. Old love, slow decay, and bam – intimacy shifts. Sexual-massage ain’t just horny vibes, nah, it’s deeper. Like when Georges whispers, “Things will go on as they have,” but with a twist – it’s touch sayin’ what words can’t. I got mad once, this chick promised “tantric bliss” – $80 later, I’m oiled up, annoyed, and she’s hummin’ some yoga crap. False advertisin’, I’d sue her ass in my courtroom! “Don’t pee on my leg, honey, I ain’t blind!”

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I sprinted down Storgata, dodging tourists and their selfie sticks. Like, come on, people! It’s a street, not a photo op! I finally made it to the harbor, panting like a dog. The fishermen were already there, laughing and joking. I felt like a total loser. But then, they offered me some fresh catch. I mean, who can say no to that?

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